Monday, July 20, 2009

writings of the self

to not be of this world i see that i must remain here allways. i must go into all that i have defined myself as when it comes through friends and family as well. i take my stand as life as myself to not longer delay me from who i am.
i will go into my days as i have been experiancing them. the word touch. touch to me is whats here as in the physical. as i see it touch is power, as to be here is my power that is me. i would define touch as what i have experianced before as touch as everything that is here. because in the touch i would pick up all information from the moment as all that is here, even by just raising my hands in the air. i do though have an association with touch that is of the mind of a belief that i am here as the touch. and what really powers this beliefn is girls and touching them lol. but from where i stand it is just to manipulate them into feeling "good" through the touch and always through points where i find most womenly on the female. i feel overpowered in this way, dominant through this belief.
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have created a belief through the touch of being able to control a female through my hands.
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have defined myself as touch as being here.
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire feeling dominant, more than other as girls, guys that i see as modern people who are into whats going on as more aware, people who back down while waalking and show signs of revertion and passiveness.
i forgive myself for acccepting and allowing myself to have portrayed myself as a dominant gangster while being in a relation with a female and upon the belief perception that females enjoy being seen as less than and being controlled through the feelings and emotions.

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